2 min read

Journal Everything Down to Talk Less

You should write down all your thoughts so that you can talk less.

Often, you'll talk to someone about your half formed ideas, but they end up being very long winded and useless. Even as a sounding board, the listener will be bored and there's no real utility to it.

Since you're forming your thoughts, what you have to say in the moment isn't really decisive and cutting. They can go in circles. Meanwhile, the listener is also left standing there. Sometimes, you have to convince them or layout your initial thoughts. That just sounds like a rant and a waste of time.

Because you think you have to convince them, you spend so much time on drivel.

Much better to process and think through first what you really believe in. If there's an argument or stance to be made, then good. You can spend time by yourself thinking about what you really believe in, what you feel you have to say, and what your supporting points are.

But even after all that, you don't even have to say it out loud. Did someone ask for your opinion? No, probably not. Do they have an obligation to listen to you? Definitely not. What's more, you yourself probably get bored when others launch into unsolicited rants or arguments. So you should be quiet and keep to yourself. Don't overstep boundaries. Don't be so self absorbed. It feels like you have middle-school kid sydrome.

Once you've written things down, they become real. You become more sure that this is what you think. That this is the flow of your thoughts and logic. Then, you will feel less of a need to go out and talk and convince others. After all, once you know what you know, there's no other reason to be insecure and tell others about it. You should be secure and confident in knowing your own preferences, opinions, thoughts first.

You can articulate your opinions and engage in dialogue and debate in other times. When it is solicited. When an opportunity arises. But don't do it in the moment when you're thinking. Don't do it suddenly out of the blue. Respect other people's time.

What's more, when you write things down you scratch that itch to articulate your thoughts. You also get to the business of developing your ideas. Rather than uselessly repeating what you think you know, you can engage with your own ideas written on paper. This allows you to progress and actually do the real work of reasoning.

You should be glad to write things down since you can be quieter. You can listen more, you will be less obnoxious, and less embarrassed. You can attain silence more easily if you just process your thoughts first by yourself.

Why should you care about listening more than you talk? Because it is obnoxious and rude to babble. It is demeaning and annoying. Just imagine when other's do it to you, it becomes so self evident.

So write down everything that comes to mind first. Use a phone, notes, quick scribbles, and voice messages. Then embrace your silence, your ability to listen more.